SUZUKI'S KNOWLEDGE OF HISTORY

It was the first day of school in New York and a new student named Suzuki, the son of a Japanese businessman, entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history...

Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?'
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Suzuki, who had his hand up.
"Patrick Henry, 1775." He said.

Very good! Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth'"?
Again,
no response except from Suzuki. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863.", said Suzuki.

The teacher snapped at the class,
"Class, you should be ashamed. Suzuki, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Japs."
"Who said that?" she demanded.
Suzuki put his hand up. "Lee Iacocca, chairman of Chrysler, 1982."

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm going to puke."
The teacher glares and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"
Again, Suzuki says, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"
Suzuki jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said, "You little Japanese shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."
Suzuki frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy 2001."
The teacher fainted.

And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're f**ked!" and Suzuki said,
"Americans in Afghanistan 2010!"